It’s been awhile, but this time tomorrow we’ll be hanging out. I’m actually kinda excited to see your sunny disposition again. Many a times, you’ve been a gracious host. I write this letter to you though, with concern. The biggest concern I have is that I expressed this exact same level of worry back in 2008, but it would seem that you weren’t listening.
You remember 2008, right? Your spokesperson was George W Bush. The whole world hated you for constantly starting shit, and let’s face it, you were a pathological liar. I know, I know … kinda mean, but you know I only say these things because I love you. To put it mildly, you were in a bad place.
Then you started to show that change was possible. Your new spokesperson was equally intelligent and funny. It was like a two-way conversation was possible. Objectively, you looked at your health and decided to try and take care of yourself. You stopped beefing (for the most part), and you even started a process of self-reflection. Sure, you aren’t perfect, but then again we sold our forests to the highest bidder—no one is.
Everything seemed cool and then you forgot your roots and started listening to a cartoon character named Donald Trump. The Donald; that’s why I write you. I’m hoping that by dropping some science about your behaviour lately, perhaps you’ll see this as an intervention from a friend that cares. It might anger you at first, but in the long run hopefully we can remain friends.
Donald is a bad friend. He has gotten you drunk and convinced you that you’re the center of the universe again. Now you want to keep out Mexicans, Syrians, or really, anyonians. I feel like you don’t even realize that the refugees that want to come and hang out, are middle class people with the wrong passports. They are just like you, but a few shades darker. That shouldn’t be a big deal because your new spokesperson is black, and you’ve accepted millions of immigrants before. Your towns and cities are built on the labour of immigrants. Hell, you, yourself, are an immigrant in some way. But here you are, hanging out with Donald, puffing your chests, talking about how you’re the best.
The guy is a cancer. He will ruin your life. He is a bully, and bullies eventually get what’s coming to them. He’s painting a target on your back and alienating your closest friends. He’s not saying what you’re thinking, but rather what you think you’re thinking. America, if you are actually thinking these things then I guess you’re not who we thought you were, and we really don’t want to hang out anymore.
I’m sorry. I just can’t justify being friends with someone that hates people just like me simply because the dirt under their feet was from a different place than the USA. I can’t justify being friends with someone who answers every question about feuds with blow them up. I can’t put up with the loud, rude, and obnoxious things you’ve said lately. I just can’t do it.
Are you really a bigot? Egotistical? A liar (Trump never likes to admit where his wealth actually comes from)? Racist? So uninformed and ignorant as to what is actually happening in the world? Impulsive? Greedy?
Are you all these things? I hope not. Legitimately, I hope you are just going through a phase, and acting out. It does scare me though; it scares a lot of us. The fact that you may give Donald Trump power of attourney, and the ability to make decisions for you shows you’re not thinking clearly. Sober up, and examine the world you want to live in, then ask yourself, “Will hanging out with Donald make that possible for me or anyone else?”
America, I beg you … kick Donald to the curb, and let’s get back to progress. Although this is likely to fall on deaf ears because it’s looking like you’re going to elect a guy that needs on the job training. Yes, I do believe you’ll elect DJT the orange monkey, because you just want to swing in the other direction like you did with the Bush to Obama transition.
WRITTEN BY JAMIE HALL Writer, Entrepreneur & Fan of Superman from Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada